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Transcript: Whitney Houston: 'I'm a Person Who Has Life'

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It's not the Svengali tactic anymore. Houston: Oh, yeah, that was between him and I. This is my first love, remember.

And she knew I wouldn't. Brown: Every now and then, you know, I smoke a joint. Sawyer: But they claim that you haven't paid them for things they did, like...

Transcript: Whitney Houston: 'I'm a Person Who Has Life' - Oath will also provide relevant ads to you on our partners' products. And I always have.

Sawyer: And they're going to be saying, how thin is she now? Sawyer: How, how many bones can we see? And how sick is she? Sawyer: They've written it. Sawyer: Houston: You know what I used to do, Diane? I would close my eyes like this, and I'd sing. I was so afraid when I'd sing. Then when I would open my eyes, the people would be what we call Holy Ghost fired out. They would be in such, spirit of praise, I think I knew then that it was an infectious thing that God had given me. Houston: 'It Wasn't Always About the Drug' Houston: No. It wasn't always about the drug. I would stay in my room for days, for days at times, just trying to get it together, to know what my next phase was going to be. Houston: People are different in the industry. It's about the money. It's about, get it fast. Sawyer: Do you think you're not tough enough for this business? Houston: Oh, I'm tough enough. Sawyer: That was a quick answer. Sawyer: I want to ask you about the cancellations. Houston: Did they tell you how many? Do you know how many? Look at my record, see the concerts I've done, and see how many I've canceled in the 17 years of my career, and add it up. Sawyer: But when you read the articles and people talk as if you're just impossible, 'cause you may show, you may not show. Sawyer: But there's some high profile things you didn't show for. They just all of a sudden just say one day he's not there. That hurt, a lot. Sawyer: People were saying that sometimes you just didn't, you didn't seem there. Houston: Probably, that probably was it. Emotional Turmoil and a Physical Reaction to Stress Houston: I'm the kind of person, if, if I have a day that is nerve-wracking, or my week has been bad or something's going down, I won't eat. Some people eat, I don't eat. And it shows in my physical frame. Sawyer: Can I ask how much you weigh now? Sawyer: How much do you weigh now? Houston: I ain't telling you. Sawyer: I think I got just sucker-punched. Do you work at it now? To keep your weight up? Sawyer: Yeah, but if people are going to be looking, and people are going to be pointing. Houston: But they always have. From the moment I stepped out there. Sawyer: And looking back, the do you apologize, do you want them to. Houston: Yeah, there are things I apologize for. But the things I apologize for, like my concert dates, those are things I apologize for, because the people really matter to me. They matter to me. And I know they came out to see me. And I apologize for that. I'll make it up to you. I said, why me? He said, because you're the only one that can sing. This is too much for me. Bobby, I'm going to quit today, OK, I'm gonna quit. If you quit now, you're going to blame me for the rest of my life. You're going to do this movie and you're going to do it well. You can't quit now. You can't turn back. You just never pictured Bobby Brown and Whitney Houston together. Love is where you find it. It's where you find it, and I found it in him, and he found it in me. Houston: Sawyer: How are you alike? Houston: He's family oriented, I am. And they didn't give us six minutes to last. We've gone 10 years. Why doesn't she just leave him? I'd like to know how her utopia is, then we can talk. Houston: He was catatonic. You know, it took him to, like, his spirit was dead, you know. Brown: Every now and then, you know, I smoke a joint. Every now and then, you know. It's not an everyday thing. It's maybe every other day. But it's not an everyday thing. But it, it, it keeps, it keeps, it keeps me calm. You know what I mean? Don't be so constrained. Sawyer: And this is forever? Houston: That's what I said. That's what I said. Sex, Drugs and Rock 'N' Roll Houston: My business is sex, drugs, rock 'n' roll. I mean, my friends, we have a good time. But as you get older, you get wiser. You stop a lot of the kid stuff. I had no time to grow up, had no time to party. I didn't even date in my, date in my 20s. I think I kind of reverted back as I got older. And I said, well I'm just gonna party, you know? It was kind of a rebel in me, you know? Sawyer: Did you think how dangerous it was? I wasn't, I wasn't like shooting heroin or anything. This is a headline. Houston: Come on, 730? I wish that was making that money off of me, you could share it with me. I want to see the receipts. I want to see the receipts. Sawyer: Is it alcohol? Houston: It has been. Sawyer: If you had to name the devil for you, the biggest devil among them? Houston: That would be me. It's my deciding, it's my heart, it's what I want. And what I don't want. Nobody makes me do anything I don't want to do. So the biggest devil is me. I'm either my best friend or my worst enemy. And that's how I have to deal with it. Sawyer: Do you think of yourself as an addict? Houston: I am addicted to a few things. I don't like to think of myself addicted. I like to think of, I had a bad habit, which can be broken. Now, if I can't make it with you and with the love of God, I'm not putting my, my, my life in someone else's hands. I'm not doing it. I'm not doing it. And I was very serious. First of all, had you been partying? Is that part of it? Houston: Was I, I can't say it was like an everyday kind of thing, yeah. I hung out with some friends and I partied. Sawyer: Did it seem to ease the pressure? Did it quiet the voice in your head? Photos taken that night showed Houston, skin and bones, even though the tape of the show that was broadcast on TV showed her fattened up. Pounds had been added to her frame. Sawyer: Did you see that they took electronic devices and changed it for the air? Houston: They did it for me and a few other people. Sawyer: Other people, too? When they said that I had died, I did, I changed my mind. I changed my mind. Because I didn't want to look like the rest of them. I didn't want to be like them. I don't ever want to be in the realm of, where I'm caught in a mold and I can't get out. Sawyer: Do you think you came close? Sawyer: I think as close as anybody, I think, can get. I know folks who have come closer. But that's as close as I want to be. That's as close as I think it gets. Sawyer: And how sure are you that those bad days you talked about are behind you? Sawyer: I know that I'm on the right path, because I'm back home where I started, in here. I can't tell you it's all going to be perfect, Diane, and I can't say... Sawyer: Yeah, because every, everybody says it's day by day, day by day. Houston: Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sawyer: But now do you say, not at all, or do you say, I can. Houston: Well, I'm not going to tell you that. I can tell you that I am not self- destructive. I'm not a person who wants to die. I'm a person who has life, who wants to live. And I always have. And I wouldn't mistake it for anything else other than that. Sawyer: Are you strong enough to do that now? Houston: I think so. Sawyer: And not let it get you? Sawyer: 'Cause most people. Houston: I pray every day that I am. I'm not the strongest every day, but I'm not the weakest, either. And I won't break. And I won't break. Sawyer: Is today a good day? Houston: Today's a great day. It's a blessed day. Sawyer: No temptations today? Houston: I have a few temptations, but it's not about drugs, it's about kicking ass, but, you know. This is a blessing. ABC News asked how hard would it be for her to change her life when drug use is so close in those she loves -- not only her husband but her two brothers have each been caught with cocaine and marijuana. Even her cousin Dionne Warwick was stopped at an airport with marijuana. Sawyer: Your cousin Houston: Jesus. Sawyer: Your cousin did. Houston: Very isolated incidents. One had nothing to do with the other. Houston: I talk to people who have been through rehab, and a lot of people that come through it, come through it with God. They tell you in a rehab that 90 percent of you are gonna return. So what I did is I looked in my soul to see what was missing. Sawyer: So for the people out there who say we want to help, we want to help build a barrier between her and drugs, what do you want them to pray for? Whitney Houston: 'Leave the Drugs Alone' Houston: Don't pray about the drugs. Leave the drugs alone. Houston: Don't, don't, pray for me, as a person, for my soul, that I'm stronger. And man, I don't care what anybody else says or did or what they claimed I was, I know I'm a child of God, and I know He loves me. Jesus loves me, this I know. Losing Friends Houston: There isn't competition. If you want to be my friend, let's remain friends. If you can't handle that, sorry. Do you feel betrayed? Sawyer: But they claim that you haven't paid them for things they did, like... Houston: They were never hired. But I won't get into it. Sawyer: Can you talk to him? What has he said to you? Houston: My father is, 81, very sick. His health is failing. Somebody is, who my father's associated with, has put fear in his heart, as if he's not my father and I'm not his daughter. Sawyer: Do you still love him? He gave me life. Before all of this, there were years that I can't forget. The bad part about it is that it's about money, and that really sucks. That's, that hurts more than anything. Sawyer: When you think it's the dad who dressed you and walked you down the aisle, what are you thinking? Can I stop, please? Sawyer: Would you like it? Krissy Houston: Yes, and I want to be like my mommy and daddy. Houston: Early in the morning, she and I would have private time together when nobody's around. And I'll sneak up to her room, about 6:00, and I'll get in the bed with her and I'll say, OK, we gotta get up in a little while. And I'll rub her stomach, wake the stomach up, wake up your back, wake up the mind, wake up the, you know, body. Krissy Houston: You know, the perfect thing is like, on, like, a Sunday or something like that, when we like, like, sit and, you know, we get to watch TV or like, listen to gospel music or have breakfast together. Sawyer: And what do you like about your mom's voice? Krissy Houston: I like her voice because it's really nice and it makes me go to sleep. Sawyer: She sings you lullabies? Houston: I love you, I love you. Sawyer: Ten years from now, give me the perfect life for Whitney Houston. Sitting, looking at my daughter grow up, become a great woman of God, grandchildren. Sawyer: And perhaps, some measure of peace for Whitney Houston, a woman whose ethereal talent is matched only by the uncertainties of her all too human life. Houston: This is my time, now. You know, love me or leave me. But love me, 'cause I love you.

First of all, had you been partying. And I'll rub her stomach, wake the stomach up, wake up your back, wake up the mind, wake up the, you know, body. We don t do crack. This past Saturday Whitney Houston joined the ignoble ranks of Jim Morrison, Janis Joplin, Jimi Hendrix, Amy Winehouse, Frankie Lymon, Bon Scott, Elvis Presley, Keith Moon, John Bonham and literally hundreds of other musicians who died base and appalling drug- and alcohol-related deaths. Sie können Ihre Einstellungen jederzeit im aktualisieren. If you quit now, you're going to blame me for the rest of my life.